Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself

This book should be required reading in high schools; an absolute must-read for everyone!
Disclaimer: I received an advance copy of this book as part of the launch team, but I was not required to write a positive review. My thoughts are my own.I wish I had the words to adequately express how much this book has helped me in my journey towards finding true peace and empowerment within myself.I grew up in a very enmeshed family where boundaries were completely non-existent. My impulse to do whatever I could to please everyone, and to try to be everything to everyone, was ingrained in me since birth. I gave pieces of myself away every day, and as I got older, I realized that I was empty. I had nothing left to give; but somehow, I just kept on giving.Around eighteen years old, I had an epiphany when I learned what ‘codependency’ and ‘boundaries’ were. It hit me like a ton of bricks: I needed boundaries in my life. This was terrifying to me, because even just the thought of saying ‘no’ to people would leave me with feelings of excruciating guilt and anxiety. I imagined it would be unbearable.I started to collect every book I could find on the subject of codependency and boundaries; and although I learned many new and enlightening things about these subjects, I still kept reverting back to old patterns. I had an understanding of codependency, and I knew I needed to start setting boundaries, but I still couldn’t figure out how to do it.Last year, I discovered Nedra on Instagram. Every one of her posts were so on point. It was like, all this time, the lightbulb was dangling over my head, but her words finally switched it ON. I was ecstatic when I learned she was writing a book. I thought, “Well, if her book is anything like these posts, that is what I need!”. I signed up to be a part of the book’s launch team, and that was one of the best decisions I’ve made for myself in a very long time.The reason ‘Set Boundaries, Find Peace’ has been so much more helpful to me than all the other books I’ve read on boundaries, is that it is so clear and direct – which is exactly what Nedra explains you have to be when setting boundaries. The way the chapters are organized is very clean and simple, and the exercises really challenge you to connect with yourself, and get to the heart of the matter you’re trying to work through. She emphasizes pushing through the feelings of guilt, and explains so concisely how guilt can trick us into believing we’re doing something wrong simply by saying ‘no’, or asking for help.On page 252, she says, “Remember: there is no such thing as guilt-free boundary setting. If you want to minimize (not eliminate) guilt, change the way you think about the process. Stop thinking about boundaries as mean or wrong; start to believe they’re a nonnegotiable part of healthy relationships, as well as a self-care and wellness practice.”She also gives you the exact words to use when setting a certain boundary, and she doesn’t leave anything to ambiguity. Not only does she include examples of real life scenarios where certain boundaries are necessary, she tells you precisely how to go about setting these boundaries in your own life. This is what every other book I’d read before was lacking. This is where the other books fell short. Nedra doesn’t just give you the tools; she tells you, clearly and directly, how to use them.I am so grateful that I got to be a part of this book’s launch team, and even though I wish this book existed years ago, I am so grateful that it exists in the world now.Give yourself one of the greatest gifts you ever could, and read this book. While I was reading it, there were times I had to put it down for a couple of days and really face some hard truths, but this is how we grow; this is how we ultimately find peace. We push through the tough stuff, and come out on the other side feeling more empowered than we ever thought possible; and this book will guide you through it, every step of the way.

So useful
I highly recommend this book to anyone who is polite, nice, agreeable person that sometimes becomes pissed of and tired with people always taking advantages

A gentle introduction to telling the world what you want.
This is a great basic book. It starts with NO assumptions that the reader has a psychology background, has attended al anon or 12 steps of any kind. She also doesn’t require the reader to understand their own motives in relationships. She guides the reader to discover their own discomfort and to develop their system for telling their truth in their own manner.

Good healthy boundaries recommendations!
This book is gives a clear understanding of what toxic boundaries may look like and offer a variety of ways to implement healthy boundaries. It hit close to home of your someone who always going over and beyond for anything of anyone.

Buena guia práctica… da buenos ejemplos y plantea ejercicios prácticos para que no sólo quede en teoria

The author lays out the points in straightforward terms, and leaves very little wiggle room. There are concrete sentences and examples that are extremely, EXTREMELY helpful. It really should have been that simple all along. Reading this made me realise just how much more peace and freedom I could have had my whole life. It also gives practical guides for how to actually set the boundaries. I think we commonly take in words from other people’s mouths just so readily, not realising that words not just only mean something, but DO things to our soul as well. But so very often people who struggle with boundaries treat utterances as “equal” and respond to them without verifying if we need to respond in the first place. It’s not just about saying No or total rejection. It’s about all the follow-ups and enacting the intention behind the “no” as well. In other words, this book is very nuanced, and not some simplistic BS about “rejecting toxic people” “just say no”, etc. Tawwab goes through why it matters and how to really make it a principle. A transformative read that should be taught in high school!

This book is all you need if you too lack boundaries in any sphere of your life n well it’s not just a book it just makes you aware where you’re lacking if you too feel overwhelmed regarding healthy boundaries